Why?

Why we use to make a storm in a glass of water?

Why we take many things so emotional?

Why I can't forget it?

Why I desire something that I cannot have, something that cannot be?

I wish I could start all over again...

I want to be selfish, and forget about everyone and everything...
If I could, I'll erase also all I know...

I really want to start over... My heart is so confused and somekind damaged...

I know, someday I'll get over it... but in the moment is painful.

Something big had changed...

Well, the life turns up-side down several times.... I guess this time was up to me do the same...

I felt kind of concern due to I liked a lot be a part of a company like Herbalife (I still am...) but because some little troubles with my organization and with myself.... I decided to work in a regular job...

So.... I searched for jobs in around a week, due to my studies and that I can speak English and some Japanese living in Mexico, it wasn't too hard to find a job quickly....

It's a job kind of easy... due to main thing to do is attend CEMEX costumers in the software & hardware area... that's something that I'm used to do with all the family :P ... the only different is that this job will pay :D.

The enviroment is very healthy, a lot of young adults (like me :) ) working in a good way, chatting and helping among them. This is not stressful for me... because the main job I got to do is help people by telephone, arrive on time and attend to some courses... (compared with be your own chief... this is a piece of cake...).

I don't know how long I'm gonna be there, I hope long enough to put my life in order... I want to start over... I feel that this is a good way to...

So, see you later ! (if anyone is reading...)
Blessings!

And Happy Holidays!!!
(Happy Hanuka, Merry Yule, Merry Christmas!!!)

= When you're feeling under pressure, something it's on your mind... =

P.S. Happy Birthday Lozano-san, and Fercho-kun!!! Fercho your party ruled!

Courage has come back!!!!!!!!!

Recently an old friend (Rodrigo Violante) has come to my city....

I miss him so much, for many things, but the main reason is... the arguing... we can chat for hours talking about one topic with different points of view, and the next day be like ever, friends...

This time we chat about my Herbalife's job, why I'm an Engineer, and I'm working as an Herbalife Distribuitor...

I found this very interesting... because, I realized, that I like studying like Engineering but I really like to work as an Herbalife Distribuitor... not just for the money, I like this way of life...

I like to have an flexible day live... it's kind of organizated but still is flexible, I don't know who I'll meet tomorrow, or where I'll be, but I'll see something new everyday...

So, I recover my real reason why I AM IN HERBALIFE, everything is getting easier :D.

See you!
Blessings!

= 明日への勇気にかえて!!!=
Tomorow will bring back the courage!!!

When you fail to someone that you care about ...

Today, was awesome, but at the same time sorrowful...

Today I had a meeting of Herbalife, the company that I work as an Independent Distribuitor... but at the same day I had a Written Japanese Test (kanken).

Normaly, for the meeting you need tickets to pass, but they ask for them until noon, so due to my Japanese test, I stay up late a day before and planned to arrive a little late for the meeting (10am).

But this time, the company asked for the tickets from the beginning!!! And even worse... I had the tickets of some distribuitors that works with me...

I really failed to them, I couldn't expect that kind of changes...
So they enter late, and couldn't have good seats... I felt really awful, I felt like I failed to them... and I guess that is some of the worst feelings that I have felt in my live....

I have to support them, to help them in anything that they need, and now I failed... maybe I'm overreacting, but they also make me to feel like that, maybe unconsciusly... but still hurts...

Yes.. indeed I cried, but I guess is not so fair.. I've tried to be the best I can, and they can't understand a little what I passed through... I don't know, sometimes we can't see our own mistakes...

I won't be overconfident for the next time... or I'll pass on the charge if it's necessary...

= Everybody hurts... sometime... =

With people, but alone....

Hi there!

I want to talk a little about the solitude...

We're always surrounded by people who cares about us and take care about us... But sometimes in life we're just alone.

Yeah, the solitude is a state of mind, like I wrote before, because you're never alone, if you turn back, you could look a lot of people who are standing up for you, as same that you'll for other one. But in your interior you know you are you, and when the real troubles comes you don't have anyone for carry on this feeling.

I don't know, maybe the mind use it like a selfdefense for keep away those people who are surrounding you.. and just takes a little infering from other people who you care to take you away and isolate you in solitude...

That's why we have to keep always facing on the bright side, for those days that comes the dark, you could still have a ray of sunshine to yourself and could carry on the troubles.

See you fellas..
If someone read me...

Bye!

= Give me the strengh to carry on, with all the love we can't go wrong =

Finally... I'm calm down...

Well, my life it's getting better...

I finally got control on myself, I feel relief... like everything just pass on...

On my job, as an Herbalife Distribuitor, it's getting better, due to my solid organization that I created, now I have to create another one like that one... But now, I know how to do it... I'm one of the lucky persons that could have the pleasure to assist to the "Extravaganza Mexicana" in Mexico city, the ticket sold out, that's why I'm so lucky...

On my studies, I finally got the Engineering degree, oficially, so no one could get me away that pleasure :). In other hand I'll start my Japanese classes for taking the Japanese Proficiency Test on December...it's just on Saturday's afternoons, so I will have no trouble to attend to them.

On my emotions, I getting better, I had to decide to be in one side, I couldn't stay as bisexual forever, I though I could, but I cannot, it carries many troubles... So I decide to go straight.. I got to confess I have already some "gay attitude" but mainly when I go out with my gay friends, so, I don't see any trouble by now, later maybe they got appart because most of them are heterofobic (the opposite of homofobic :S). But my true friends will stay with me for who I am, and not for my sexual preferences...

So nowadays I'm calm down and getting better :).
See you
Blessings!

=私の世界、夢と恋と不安で出来てる=
My world　is made of dreams, love, and worries.

Interlude....

A long time a go that I didn't write in my blog... the truth is that I didn't feel to do it.. or I didn't want to... maybe both of them

Well, I'm still working as a Herbalife Independent Distribuitor, helping people to chance their lives... Everything fine about that, but about office's relationships was kind of hard, the worst was I haven't done anything... but when are trouble in the office it affect to all of us.

The main problem was the lack of communication among the partners, and it's very important that if you share an office, you also have to share ALL the information of
how handle each one his/her system for avoid missunderstandings, but thanks God, the trouble is over...

About myself, well I fell like in an interlude... shomehow like waiting for something to happen to go back to the action, something that makes me feel to fight again for I believe. My main trouble is that I feel like everything is easy and I hold over the task untill the deadline.

About my emotions, nowadays I feel just great alone... I got time to myself, I'm not so sure what I want, but I want to change, I don't want the same thing... That's why I got a little distants from all I used to hang on... I don't feel in my enviroment, I feel like overwhelming... I can't see my future in a gay life...

I felt it, that you have the power to choose... This subject is to controversial, but it's what I think.

See you!
Blessings!

= ¿Y dónde quedó ese botón que lleva a la felicidad? =

Going through emotions...

I don't know what to say, sometimes I'm so happy, sometime I'm kind of depress... I don't know what's stopping me to go on...

I got over Carlos, I just remember him like a good moment forgeting anything that he could hurt to me.. "Write in rock the good times, write in sand the bad moments.."

I'm finally kind of independent from my parents, they respect my point of view, my financial independence...

My sexual preferences are kind of undeterminated, by now, I just know that I'm myself.. I do want to have a family in the future.. but sometimes I like some guys... I dunno... Even so, I don't think too much about it... I guess It'd solve by itself.

So, I don't know what is the thing that is stopping me... I feel kind of "in the middle of nowhere"...

See you later!
This week will finish fine, I had a feeling...

=Going through emotions, lossing all my drive, I can't even see, if this is really me, but I just want to be... ALIVE!=

Tuesday 13th...

Hi! Because now I have ( or I think I have ) a new friend from East of Europe, I'll write my blog in English, moreover, more people could understand what I want to express. :D

Well, I don't know exactly why, but a lot of people says that the real kabalistic day is Tuesday 13th , and everyone thinks that's Friday 13th. I just didn't believe that, I just thought about those days, just like any other day...

But I did get wrong! I just had the most wonderful day on the Tuesday 13th!
I was kind of depressed these days and I really didn't know why... but since yesterday I feel great!

First of all, I finished to clean my quartz(a stone that the legend says that it's holy water from God turned into stone, the quartz has to be cleaned to erase the feelings that it had absorbed). But when I started to clean it, I didn't realize that it'll finish on the day 13th, and had passed a Full Moon, which brings more luck!

Then I received a lot of calls asking for a job, (due to I work in Herbalife I need new people to become distribuitor) and I kept one! (Stadistics show that you only get 1 from 10, but I got 1 from 2 who assisted to the interview, evenmore! today I got 5 from 5!).

And getting my day over.. I met a REALLY handsome and good looking guy... Jivko

I had to admit, that he's a model from a page on the internet, and I payed to him, but he was SO NICE, even he offers to me to be in contact.. and I loved that. Evenmore, due to his looking alike the person I wished the most... the "Ingeniero Lozano" (Mr.Lozano, in Spanish we use to use the title from our careers, in this case... Engineer)

Even so.. I don't think this guy it's exactly like him, but he seems very nice and talkative, I wish I could make a friendship with him, besides his work. Moreover, we are in very different places in the world, but you never know, maybe some day he could come to Mexico and I'll recieve him like an old friend, or maybe I could travel around the world and pass by where he's living.... Call me "Dreamer" but anything is possible.

Well, for now it's all I have to say, but I feel really great! Thanks Jivko, you made my day SO SPECIAL.

Well, see you later fellas!
Take care!

Blessings!

Luis Reyes

Entra mas hago, menos escribo...

Pues si, cada vez he estado escribiendo mas espaciadamente, la verdad entre que no sé si alguien lea esto, o si realmente importe :S.

Por fin alguien salió de mi vida para bien... no daré muchos detalles porque no vale la pena ni siquiera mencionarlo.. actualmente no... aunque en su tiempo fue una parte importante en mi vida... ahora ya se que tanto puede decepcionarte una persona.

Mi trabajo en Herbalife va cada vez mejor... a pesar que no he tenido un distribuidor comprometido nuevo, al menos yo he tenido nuevas metas en la compañía y me he podido comprometer mas conmigo mismo, he descubierto quién soy, quién era y quién quiero ser, sin importar lo que me suceda en la vida... me podre tardar la vida entera, pero al menos ya se hacia donde me dirijo.

Esto último me trajó varias consecuencias... he tenido que soltar amigos, "amistades" y conocidos que a veces no hacen mal.. pero estorban... porque no ayudan y te hacen sentir que no vale la pena por lo que luchas.. o que no es posible lograrlo...

Se siente raro estar "solo", de repente te llega la melancolía de cuando salía cada fin; pero tengo que soportar esto un rato, mientras cumplo mis metas y me encuentro gente como yo, que tenga los mismos impetus, los mismos deseos y metas.

Conocí a una chava hace poco por casualidad y rara coincidencia (a pesar que ya sabia quien era, nunca habia platicado con ella), se llama Lilia, es amiga de Rigo, CHava y Fercho, de la FIME y de notar que es muy buena onda :), tenemos ciertas cosillas en común.

Bueno, son las noticias de momento que tengo... o al menos las que me acuerdo despues de este gran intervalo... espero poder escribir mas seguido de nuevo...

¡Hasta Luego!
¡Bendiciones!

=Lo merezco pero no lo quiero, por eso me voy...=

ネセシト デサオガルメ デ アルグナ フォルマ。。。

アシ　ケ　エスシリビレ　デ　ロス　ケ　シエント　ケ　メ　ダニャロン　ウン　ポコ。。。

エンピエゾ　コン　エル　ロザノ先生。。。エラス　ウン　ギア　パラ　ミ。。。テ　ケリア　タント　テ　エスティマバ　タント。。。　コモ　メ　プディステ　ファヤル。。。ペンサバ　テルミナル　トド　ロ　ケ　テ　デビア　ノ　テ　ウビエラ　ファヤド　ペロ　トゥ　シ　ア　ミ。。。テニアモス　ウン　パクト。。。ロ　テニアモス。。。

ルベン　「エルマノ」ポルケ　ノ　フイステ？　ポルケ　ノ　メ　アス　アブラド？　クンピリ　アニョス。。。シ　スピエラス　ロ　インポルタンテ　イ　ロ　フェリズ　ケ　ウビエラ　シド　シ　シンペレメンテ　メ　ウビエラス　ヤマド オ ウビエラス　イド　ウン　ラト。。。

ロマン　「プリモ」ア　ティ　テ　コンテ　アンテス　ケ　ナディエ。。。　コンタバ　コン　ケ　エストゥビエラス　アイ。。。　メファヤステ　イ　ニシキエラ　メ　フェリシタステ。。。イ　ノ　メ　アス　ダド　ニ　ウナ　ラゾン　デル　ポルケ　ノ　フイステ。。。エストイ　トリステ　ポルエソ。。。クレイ　ケ　エラモス　マス　アミゴス。。。

ミ　パパ。。。　ノ　プエド　クレエル　ケ　トド　ロ　ケ　ソイ　パラ　ティ　ノ　バルガ　シ　レスルト　セル　ゲイ。。。ポル　ティ　テンゴ　ケ　オクルタル　ラ　ミタド　デ　ミ。。。スフロ　タント　イ　ノ　エス　ポル　エル　エチョ　デ　テネル　グストス　ディスティントス　シノ　ポルケ　ノ　メ　アポヤス。。。

レクラモ　デ　エスタ　マネラ。。。ポルケ　キエロ　ケ　エル　メノル　ヌメロ　デ　ペルソナス　セ　エンテレン　ケ　エヨス　メ　ファヤロン　イ　タンポコ　キエロ　レクラマルレス。。。ヤ　ケ　コモ　ウマノ。。。ヨ　タンビエン　エストイ　セグロ　ケ　レ　エ　ファヤド　アルギエン。。。ペルドン　シ　ロ　イゼ。

閉ざしていた心の海にこぼれた涙

Y pasó mi cumple...

Pues quién sabe que me pase la verdad...pero los días cercanos a mi cumpleaños ando bien "Drama Princess"...

Será porque de niño casi no pude celebrar mis cumpleaños, ya que caía en semana santa, por lo que ó estaban fueras o simplemente no se acordaban... por eso le doy mas importancia de lo que debería. Sumenle que no me gusta andar recordando mi cumpleaños cuando se acerca...

Por eso mismo, les doy las gracias a todos los que me llamaron y se acordarón de mi ese día ;).

Como les iba comentando, pues ese dia me fue X, fui a recoger la casa del dia de la party, a llevar y traer cosas...

El sábado pasado (1° de abril) hubo un evento de Herbalife en la ciudad, en verdad que estuvo extraordinario.

Aparte de eso ando viendo en comprarme un carro propio, ya que gracias a Dios el negocio me esta dejando... pero al parecer me voy a tener que esperar un poco ya que financiado no me lo autorizan por no contar con nomina ¬¬¡.

Bueno... a ver que pasa.
¡Nos vemos!
¡Se cuidan!

空にほうりなげた希望が雨上がり七色の虹を描いて
sorani hourinageta kibouga ame agari nana irono nijiwo egaite
"El cielo esconde la esperanza, la muestra cuando lluvia termina en los siete colores del arcoiris"

Birthday Party...

¿Qué onda?

Pues aquí con la novedad que se me ocurrió hacerme una fiesta de cumpleaños, cumplo el 29 de marzo, pero puesto que cae en miércoles decidí adelantarla, asi que aun tienen tiempo para felicitarme :P.

Fue un show para organizarla yo solo, por suerte mi prima Sandra me ayudo mucho (aunque ya le debo un Corola de Toyota y la mitad de un depa... jeje aunque no hay fecha :P).

Despues de todo, el sabado se llevo la fiesta sin contratiempos, y fueron la gente que iba a ir... mis amigos ;). Puesto que no tenía suficiente presupuesto solo invite a mis amigos, puesto que ya no me quedó para conocidos, asi que una disculpa si lees esto y no te pude invitar :P.

Doy gracias a Joel y Peña por el delicioso pastel de chocolate que llevaron, a Jonathan por la cheve :D y a Sandra por las sodas y el jugo ;).

Gracias a todos los que asisitieron, en serio que significo mucho para mí que estuvieran ahi, aunque fuera "de paso".

¡Nos vemos!

Después de mucho tiempo....

¡Hola! Después de mucho tiempo regresó a mi blog...

Paso tanto en tan poco tiempo, que creo que no lo asimilé bien....

En Enero, todo pasó sin contratiempos, me volví a inscribir a japonés, mi idea original era entrar al nivel intermedio, pero no pude, por haber salido hace mas de un año de idiomas, intenté entrar por ubicación pero el esfuerzo fue en vano :S. Bueno, al fin mi idea original era entrar en 5to para repasar 5to y 6to, pero como habian abierto nivel intermedio (muy raro) quería ver si podía...

Mis nuevos compañeros de japonés son mas de "mi tipo", me llevo de una mejor manera con ellos que con los que tenía originalmente, son mas tranquilos y al menos les gustan cosas afines a las mías... no tanto freak de anime y videojuegos.. (si, admito que me gustan, pero a un nivel muy moderado actualmente, para un otaku ¬¬¡).

En Enero, mi relación con Carlos se empezó a fracturar, no se a que influyó... no se si fui yo, o él que me ponía atención de mas... al parecer aun no estoy listo para una relación de largo termino... o tan seria... pero debo confensar que fue algo que no olvidaré, terminamos en Febrero...

Ahora en Marzo el negocio en Herbalife cada vez a estado creciendo más, espero que todo siga bien, tengo que seguir con este esfuerzo para lograr mis metas...

Y pues en general, ahorita solo, pero bien, a gusto...

¡Nos vemos, se cuidan!
¡Bendiciones!

＝残酷な天使のように少年神話になれ。＝
(Zankokuna tenshino youni shonen shinwani nare)
= Ante la crueldad de un angel, conviertete en una leyenda =